Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Dick Move, Peloton

An imaginary reader writes:

 "PruDog, I worship you.  But I live in fear that I will do something to make you mad.  Can you help me by telling me what not to do?" 

Sincerely,

Not A Real Person

Well NARP, you're in luck because my facebook friends acquaintances stalkers and I have put together this handy list of the Top 10 7 dick moves in cycling:

  1. Sitting up to force a split.  By the far the agreed upon leader of dick moves.  It doesn't matter when.  Sitting second wheel with a team mate in front?  Slow it up and you suck.  In the break with a team mate and want to have a good excuse for getting dropped?  Don't bother scraping a couple riders with you so you can play that off.  You suck.  Sitting up in a dropped group?  Still suck.
  2. Attacking when the field is passing a neutralized field.  I know you're thinking "but PruDog, I do that and I thought you liked me".  Yes I do like you.  But it's still a dick move!  Listen, that gap is only opening because the guys behind you can't tell if which field is which and are blocked out by the slower field. 
  3. Sitting on riders and then jumping them when bridging gaps.  I see this all the time at PR.  A gap opens and a rider drills to close it.  No one will go through.  The rider begs for help  -- none comes.  Then, as he runs out of gas he gets jumped.  If it's a group that's behind him he gets to recover, maybe.  If it's bridging to a break he's likely stuffed.  Either way, dick move.  Just go through.  The only time this is remotely acceptable is if you have a rider in the break and the rider you're sitting on is so strong that you need to do anything you can to keep him from catching on.  But even then -- I've seen that scenario like once in 20 years.
  4. Blocking a chase.  I got to say this used to be an every race occurrence years ago but has gotten better.  But, if guys are chasing your team mate the etiquette is to sit right behind the chasers, not disrupt the chase.  
  5. Not sitting on when you can't pull through.  If you're in a move, we want you to pull.  But if you aren't or can't pull through the correct technique is to sit off rotation so that the riders coming back can see where they need to slot in.  Riders who sit in the "up line" block out the riders trying to rotate.  Riders who go through and then don't pull through block us.
  6. Killing it in the break.  I think guys who do this don't realize it.  But, if you go to the front and kill it you end up stretching the pace line and putting everyone on the rivet so they can't pull through.  Obviously, this one requires a judgement call-- are these guys sitting on?  But usually if guys are coming through just not hard enough for your tastes it because they can't go that hard.
Got any more?

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