Pruitt Comes Clean

The following is the text of PruDog's press conference today. Oddly, only Rudolfo Von Chestnut was in attendance.

I come to you today to admit that I too have tested the drug EPO. During a dark period in my racing I went online and reserached the drug EPO. However, after hitting "checkout" my credit card had a bad reaction and I was unable to actually secure the products. Of course, I was totally clean when I won PR. While I hope I have not let anyone down, if I have please buy the new book I have written anyway. It's called "Boring: My Story of not really doing anything worth writting a book about".