Valley of the Sun here I come, and I am not looking forward to it

Ok, so I have a 1-1/2 long gash on my right testicle. Imagine an orange, slit it open and remove a scoop of sperm and there you go.

The practical problem is Valley of the Sun starts Friday.. and I got to say I don't think I am going to be in much shape to enjoy it. No TT bike for me; I think I will be rolling last place in the Friday TT and just hope that I can sit on the bike for the road race....