Thursday, August 30, 2012

Consistency is the Hobgoblin of Small Minds

So some people (*cough*Tubbs*cough*) seem to expect a certain level of sophistication, consistency and (worst of all) spell checking from me.  Well screw you guys.  This is an amateur blog and I intend to live up that Amateur title fully.

Instead, I will deflect the conversation but asking why everyone is always picking on poor Apex?  First Audi yells at them.  The HSP yells at them.  What did they do?

Friday, August 24, 2012

My Snark is not Snarky

Well, fuck me but I have zero interesting to say about nothing especially not Lance's decision to get off the arbitration train.  Velonews has some ideas though

I am more concerned about why Ian Tubbs keeps ducking the one race that would cement him as The Best Washington State Amateur Cyclist Ever: Ronde Ohop.  Oh sure, he'll bring up his NRC experience, victory at Rainier Roubaix or apparent victory in the years BARR.  But screw that.  Real men race Ronde Ohop. 

So I am calling your shit our Tubbs!  Ronde next year.  Or you are dead dead dead to me.  For 24 hours.  Cause, actually, I just can't quit Tubbs.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012


 It's no SeaOtter but we even had a mini expo at Ronde.  Next year: beer garden.

2012 Ronde Ohop Results - all official like

While I am aware there is some controversy among the 1/2/3 field on the results after the podium you can find the official results here.

Brief notes about results:  The officials are responsible for these.  Your complaints, objections and vitriol should be aimed at them.  I should only receive your love and admiration.  I am a delicate flower and easily wilt under the shining light of your righteousness!  Seriously though, I stay out of results other than being sympathetic to your plight (and to the difficulty of getting them right).  That said, I do track challenges and try to enable the officials to get it right(er).  So I will do my best to help them improve next year.  Also, results are official after the protest period so if you leave before posted you essentially agree to them.  I know this can be frustrating but I have been on the other side where official results were posted and I had placed on the podium of a Cat 1/2 Stage Race only to have the promoter / officials revise the results due to a local riders protest *2 days* after the event finished.  I've also been on the "winning" end were I was given a top 10 placing at a major race when I was a lap down and the officials wouldn't change it even though I contacted them days later asking to be given a corrected (lower) placing.  Even if the all the riders involved agree to change the results it's a can of worms most officials won't get into.

Finally: Beer.

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Monday, August 20, 2012

HSP Probably took my money

That's a lot of beer being splashed around by the Pro 1/2/3 Podium. I suspect Todd and Richter are excited because they came to my house, took my Rainier tall boys and likely are getting that fat $600 check too. I'll give credit to Audi for coming out to fight for it but other than Zach were were the Garage boys???? Have you no shame??? And I am not even going to mention my elite squad teammates.

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Thursday, August 16, 2012

My Cross Is Teh Suck

The only hard candy that's going to be dished out the cross season the hard candy aimed at PruDog.  Just sayin'

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Are you Bad Ass?

Is your team Bad Ass?  Because we got us a $600 check for the Baddest Assiest team at Ronde.   Just sayin.

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Tuesday, August 14, 2012

You can thank me later

With the awesome Dark Knight Trilogy concluded (and the new Batman Beyond trilogy set-up perfectly) I thought it would be a nice thing if I went ahead and posted the 15 minute version for all of you who missed the movies but want in on being "in".

Batman Begins: The Drama-dy

The Dark Knight: Wiggles

The Dark Knight Rises: Maybe

As an added bonus here's a teaser for the new Wolverine movie:

Friday, August 10, 2012

2012 WA Cup Standing after Round 3

After three rounds of the 2012 WACup (Andy Salmon, Mashel Nisqually & KR Road Race) here are the standings.  The final round is Ronde Ohop.

Cat 1/2 Men

Cat 3 Men

Masters 35+ 1/2/3

Masters 50+


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Thursday, August 09, 2012

Now is not the time for fear: Inspirational Speach from Bane

Many of you have been no doubt disappointed by the lack of variety on this  stupid blog.  Why, once upon a time you actually could come here and find something that wasn't about Ronde Ohop or how fat I've gotten.  Well, I am sorta proud to say I am still Ronde-blogging but am shaking it up by having world renowned Urban Renewal Expert Bane give you a motivational speach to prepare you for Ronde Ohop.

Now Is Not The Time For Fear by Bane

Cyclists, take control... take control of your racing. Behold Ronde Ohop, the instrument of your liberation! Identify yourself to the world!

Behind you stands a symbol of oppression; Ronde Ohop, where a thousand men have languished under the dirt of this course.  The Ronde, which has been held up to you as the shining example of suffering.  You have been supplied with a false idol to stop you from dominating this epic race. Let me tell you the truth about Ronde Ohop from the words of Seattle's own dirt idol, Andy Salmon. 'The Ronde didn't break me, It powered my motivation despite my appalling lack of form early in the season. I praise this mad race that tries to crush us .
The Ronde is our reckoning.

Calm down, Cyclists! Now's not the time for fear. That comes later.

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Wednesday, August 08, 2012

2012 Ronde Ohop Flyer

The Ronde Ohop is a Washington Cup event.  The Washington Cup series of events evoke the Belgian tradition of short, fast and hard races.  Running through rural Eatonville and the local parks the race runs on good county roads with 13 total miles of dirt road.

Registration & Surcharges:  Online at USACycling or day of at the Mashel Loop.  Registration closes 20 minutes before the start of each event.  The entry fee includes $3 per rider per day for USA Cycling insurance. A current year USA Cycling Rider Waiver and Release form must be signed by the participant and, if under 18, by the parent or legal guardian.

License: To enter any race for Men Cat 4 and above or Women Cat 3 and above a USAC annual license must be presented. Purchase online at (not for sale at the race). All beginners (Cat 5 Men, Cat 4 Women) may race on one-day license. No exceptions. OBRA riders of any category other than Beginner must present a valid USAC license. Foreign riders must purchase one-day license or present proof of out-of-country insurance. One-day licenses are $10, available at the race.

Numbers & Placement: WSBA numbers will be used. The officials request that both bib numbers be clearly visible placed parallel with your jersey’s side seam on the back and above the pockets. Frame number should be attached per WSBA instructions. Examples of proper placement: Rental numbers are available for a $10 fee ($5 refundable). For out-of-state riders a $5 number refundable deposit will be assessed.

Course description:  Race starts at Mashel Loop field.  Races will cover 2 to 4  laps of the 6 mile Eatonville Loop circuit (all paved)  then 10 laps of the Mashel Loop (the Mashel Loop is 1 mile road, 1.25 mile dirt).  Course map & profiles can be found at

Wheel Support:   Neutral wheel support will be provided.  In addition to two neutral wheel pits, there will be two additional wheels in/wheels out pits on the course for a total of three wheel pits on the Mashel Loop. The organizer is not responsible for wheels or equipment left at the race.

Results: Results will be posted at registration.  Results become final 15 minutes after posting. Questions concerning results should be directed to the Chief Judge at the Finish line.

Directions to Start:  Parking will be at the Nisqually- Mashel State Park on the right under the power lines.  For navigation or map purposes the address 437th St E Eatonville, Wa near the intersection of Hwy 7 and Mashel Prairie Rd.  Note that there is a similar address near LaGrande.  This is not correct so be sure it's the one off Hwy 7.   

From North or South on I-5  Take exit 127. Drive east on Hwy 512 for two miles, then take the Pacific Ave./Mt. Rainier exit south. Follow Pacific Ave. about five miles to where the road splits in a "Y." Follow signs for Mt. Rainier (the left branch of the fork) taking Hwy 7 south. Drive about 17 miles, passing Ohop Valley Rd.   At the top of the long sweeping hill turn right onto the Mashel Prairie Road on the right side. Go about ¾ of a mile and park on the right side under the power lines

Contact: Michael Pruitt at
Additional Event Info: USACycling

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Tuesday, August 07, 2012

Ronde Ohop Team Prize

In an extremely cheap and blatant attempt to increase pre-registration and stop HSP from dominating the 1-2-3 Ronde Ohop again we've decided to add a new feature to this years Ronde Ohop: a team prize.

What is it?  A $600 check to the team that gets the most points on the day.

How does it work?  Each pre-registered rider will receive points based on their placing.  The team with the most points for the day wins.

There can't possibly be any details can there?  In fact they are.  Here are the important ones:

  •  total team points are based on pre-registered riders in the same sub-category.  For example riders registered in the 1-2-3 race collect points for their team in that race only.  So a team that fields 5 Cat 4 riders and 5 Cat 1-2-3 riders will end up with two team: their Cat 4 team and their 1-2-3 team.  Sub Categories are the ones you can register for online.  
  • Only pre-registered riders are eligible for team award points.  Why?  Because that's part of why we are doing this that's why.  Also it standardizes your team names and makes point calculations doable.

  • I registered as KR and my teammate as Killer Rohrbots.  We didn't get team points together can you fix that?  No.  Assume that a volunteer who doesn't know that HB and Hagens are the same team is calculating results; we will not fix it.  That said, the pre-registration system should prefill team names
  • When will results be posted?  We will post them 20 minutes after the last race results are finalized.  We will then post here and give everyone 24 hours to bitch and moan before I mail a check to the winners.
  • What are the points?  They go from 1st through 20th on a sliding scale then 5 pts for every finisher after that.
1.. 100 
2.. 90
3.. 80
4.. 75 
5.. 65 
6.. 60 
7.. 55
8.. 50 
9.. 45 
10.. 40 
11.. 35 
12.. 30 
13.. 25 
14.. 20 
15.. 19 
16.. 18 
17.. 17 
18.. 16 
19.. 15 
20.. 14
21.. 13
20.. 12
19.. 11
18.. 10
19.. 9
20.. 8
21-60 5pts

I am sure more details to follow.

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